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» Film-Tech Forum   » Community   » Bob Maar's Joke-A-Thon   » Corney Jokes

   
Author Topic: Corney Jokes
Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)


Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001


 - posted 12-10-2006 07:09 AM      Profile for Bob Maar   Author's Homepage   Email Bob Maar   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Rated G [Smile]

To confuse a frog, put it in a round bowl and tell it to croak in the corner.

Answer: To confuse you,, frog hops out, says, "I needed that nap - thanks! I feel much better."

It's summer time. What shoes does a frog wear?
Answer: Open toad!

Why did the frog cross the bridge?
Answer: Because the chicken crossed the road.

Why did the frog cross the street?
Answer: Because the chicken crossed the road.


Q: Why are frogs so good at baseball?
A: Because they catch a lot of flies...
Ms. Schneider's 4th grade morning reading class at Rootstown Elementary School in Rootstown, Ohio



Q: Why are frogs so happy?
A: They eat whatever bugs them!

Q: What happens when two frogs collide?
A: They get tongue tied!

Q: How does a frog feel when he has a broken leg?
A: Unhoppy.

Q: What happens when you mix a frog with a bathtub scrubby-mit?
A: A rubbit!

Q: Why did the frog read Sherlock Holmes?
A: He liked a good croak and dagger.

Q: What's green green green green green?
A: A frog rolling down a hill

Q: What is a frog's favorite game?
A: Croaket

Q: What did the frog order at McDonald's?
A: French flies and a diet Croak

Q: Why did the frog say meow?
A: He was learning a foreign language.

Q: Why did the frog go to the hospital?
A: He needed a "hopperation" !

Q: What is the thirstiest frog in the world?
A: The one who drinks Canada Dry!

Q: What do stylish frogs wear?
A: Jumpsuits!

Q: What does a bankrupt frog say?
A: "Baroke, baroke, baroke." [Big Grin]

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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)


Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001


 - posted 12-10-2006 07:12 AM      Profile for Bob Maar   Author's Homepage   Email Bob Maar   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Rated G [Smile]

A clever elderly woman decided to have her portrait painted. So she told the artist, "Paint me with diamond earrings,a diamond necklace, an emerald bracelet, and a gold Rolex."

But you are not wearing any of those things!" the artist pointed out.

"I know,"she said. "It's in case I die before my husband.
"If he remarries right away, I want his new wife to go crazy looking for the jewelry." [Big Grin]

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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)


Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001


 - posted 01-25-2007 02:39 PM      Profile for Bob Maar   Author's Homepage   Email Bob Maar   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Rated G [Smile]

Question: What does poisoned corn flakes have in common with Charles Manson?

Answer: They are both Cereal (Serial) Killers.

The baby corn asks his mama corn: Where do baby corns come from?

Mama says "I told ya before, the stalk (stork) brought ya.

Two corn cobs were walking downtown and the first cob noticed that they were being followed by another strange cob everywhere they went. The first cob whispered to the second cob "Don't look know but I think we are being followed by a stalker" [Big Grin]

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Charles Caron
Expert Film Handler

Posts: 188
From: Billings MT, USA
Registered: Jul 2005


 - posted 10-17-2007 07:31 PM      Profile for Charles Caron   Email Charles Caron   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Who are the leaders of the militant cornflakes?

General Mills and Captain Crunch.

What do you get when you cross a road with a bicycle?

Run over!!

[ 10-18-2007, 11:11 PM: Message edited by: Charles Caron ]

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