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Author Topic: Bumper Stickers
Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)

Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001

 - posted 12-12-2005 01:01 PM      Profile for Bob Maar   Author's Homepage   Email Bob Maar   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Rated G PG PG 13 R &


A bad day of fishing turns into a good day of drinking.
A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.
A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.
A clean house is a sign of a misspent life.
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
A conscious is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
A day without sunshine is like, well, night.
A diplomat thinks twice before saying nothing.
A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.
A fool and his money are my best friends.
A fool and his money are soon partying.
A hundred thousand sperm and you were the fastest?
A husband is someone who takes out the trash and gives the impression he just cleaned the whole house.
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.
A man decided not to report his stolen credit card because the thief was spending less than his wife did.
A man is not complete until he is married - then he is finished.
A mouse is an elephant built by the Japanese.
A PBS mind in an MTV world.
A penny saved is a government oversight.
A pessimist is never disappointed.
A real gentleman wouldn't stare at my stickers. Answer my prayer - steal this car.
A waist is a terrible thing to mind.

Abbotsford – smell our dairy air!

According to my calculations, the problem doesn’t exist.

Adrenaline is my drug of choice.

Adult child of alien invaders.
Adults are just kids who owe money.

Air pollution is a mist-demeaner.

Alcohol and calculus don't mix. Never drink and derive.

All generalizations are false, including this one.
All I want is less to do, more time to do it, and higher pay for not getting it done.
All life's answers are on TV. Bart Simpson
All men are animals, some just make better pets.
All men are idiots, and I married their King.
All work and no play, will make you a manager.

Allow me to introduce my selves.

Alone: In bad company.

An eye for an eye… leaves the whole world blind.

Always glad to share my ignorance - I've got plenty.
Always proof-read carefully to see if you any words out.
Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
Always try to be modest - and be damn proud of it!

Am I getting smart with you? How would you know?

Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.

Ambivalent? Well, yes and no.
And which dwarf are you?
And whose cruel idea was it for the word "Lisp" to have a "s" in it?
And your crybaby whiny-assed opinion would be?

Anything free is worth what you pay for it.

Archaeologists will date any old thing.

Are the noises in my head bothering you?
Are those your eyeballs? I found them in my cleavage.
Are you following Jesus this close?
Are You Having Phone Sex Or Do You Always Drive That Way?

Artificial intelligence usually beats real stupidity.

ASCII a stupid question, get a stupid ANSI!

As a matter of fact, I do own the road.
As I said before, I never repeat myself.
As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools.

Ask me about microwaving cats for fun and profit.
Ask me about my vow of silence.

Atheism is a nonprophet organization.

Avenge Yourself - live long enough to be a problem to your children. [Big Grin]

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