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» Film-Tech Forum   » Community   » Bob Maar's Joke-A-Thon   » Useless Fact's (Page 1)

 
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Author Topic: Useless Fact's
Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)


Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001


 - posted 03-08-2002 01:52 PM      Profile for Bob Maar   Author's Homepage   Email Bob Maar   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Rated G

In the middle ages, bread was was divided according to status.

Workers got the burnt bottom of the loaf, the family got the middle, and guests got the top, or the "upper crust".  -

[ 03-18-2006, 03:07 PM: Message edited by: Bob Maar ]

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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)


Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
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 - posted 03-09-2002 06:49 AM      Profile for Bob Maar   Author's Homepage   Email Bob Maar   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Rated G  -

In the 1500s people cooked in the kitchen in a big kettle that always hung over the fire.

Every day they lit the fire and added things to the pot. They mostly ate vegetables and didn't get much meat. They would eat the stew for dinner leaving leftovers in the pot to get cold overnight and then start over the next day.

Sometimes the stew had food in it that had been in there for a month. Hence the rhyme, "Peas porridge hot, peas porridge cold, peas porridge in the pot nine days old".

[ 03-18-2006, 03:08 PM: Message edited by: Bob Maar ]

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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)


Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
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 - posted 03-09-2002 07:21 PM      Profile for Bob Maar   Author's Homepage   Email Bob Maar   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Rated G

Why is the guy who leads the football team called a "quarterback?"

Because on the first day of training camp he put a dollar bill in the $.75 Coke machine, didn't get change, and compulsively complained about it ever afterward, earning this derisive nickname?

Of course not. The name comes from the way football teams lined up when the game was just catching on over a hundred years ago. In the backfield, the furthest behind the offensive line, was a lone fullback. In front of him, closer to the line, were the two running backs, known as the halfbacks. The guy in the backfield to whom the center snapped the ball was closer yet to the offensive line. I guess this is like a Scholastic Aptitude Test question, but given what you've been told so far, what would YOU call him?

Whaddaya you mean, you'll pass?

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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)


Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
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 - posted 03-11-2002 02:08 PM      Profile for Bob Maar   Author's Homepage   Email Bob Maar   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Rated G

Why is New York called "The Big Apple?"

New York's nickname "The Big Apple" was coined by jazzmusicians, who used to say "There are many apples on the tree, but to play in New York City is to play The Big Time . . . The Big Apple!"

Later, the New York City Convention and Visitors Bureau popularized the nickname because the Bureau thought it gave the city a "bright and shining image."

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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)


Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
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 - posted 03-11-2002 02:11 PM      Profile for Bob Maar   Author's Homepage   Email Bob Maar   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Rated G

Early politicians required feedback from the public to determine what was considered important to the people.

Since there were no telephones, TV's or radios, the politicians sent their assistants to local taverns, pubs and bars who were told to "go sip some ale" and listen to people's conversations and political concerns.

Many assistants were dispatched atdifferent times . "You go sip here" and "you go sip there." The two words "go sip" were eventually combined when referring to the local opinion and thus, we have the term "gossip".

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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)


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From: New York City & Newport, RI
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 - posted 03-12-2002 09:22 AM      Profile for Bob Maar   Author's Homepage   Email Bob Maar   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Rated G

Who invented the modern lottery?"

There are lots of references to lottery-like activities in the Bible, and the Romans used them to sell property. In the United States today, lotteries finance education. I got an education from my state's lottery. Many losing tickets have taught me that I have a better chance of winning at the track.

The people of Renaissance Florence are credited with developing the modern public lottery, run by the state to finance its operations without raising taxes, and paying off the winners in cash. With the formation of a united Italy in the mid-19th century, that new nation-state also became the first country to run a national lottery.

My local diner holds a lottery with the prize of a free turkey dinner. In truth, you take a chance whenever you eat there.

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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)


Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001


 - posted 03-12-2002 10:32 AM      Profile for Bob Maar   Author's Homepage   Email Bob Maar   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Rated G

Honey keeps almost forever on the shelf. It's probably the most long lasting of any food and has been found in a still edible state after sitting for centuries in Egyptian tombs dating back to the Pharaohs.

Remember that the next time you're tempted to tell YOUR honey that he or she is spoiled rotten.

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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)


Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
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 - posted 03-15-2002 09:27 AM      Profile for Bob Maar   Author's Homepage   Email Bob Maar   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Rated G


The origins of the hand salute can be traced back further to the Romans when a person appearing before the Senate would raise his right hand to show that he was unarmed.

Then in the middle ages knights would raise their sheilds to show friendly intentions.
Both of these are the origins of the modern day hand
salute.

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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)


Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
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 - posted 03-19-2002 12:54 PM      Profile for Bob Maar   Author's Homepage   Email Bob Maar   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Rated G


The "Zip" in U. S. postal zip codes stands for Zone Improvement Plan. It came into use in 1963. It helps the Post Office deliver more mail in a day than FedEx does in a year. The Post Office also maintains a fleet of more than 200,000 vehicles.

Unfortunately, they lack steering wheels, which is why mail is often delivered to the wrong place.

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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)


Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001


 - posted 03-21-2002 01:52 PM      Profile for Bob Maar   Author's Homepage   Email Bob Maar   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Rated G

What's the difference between pathos and bathos?

It's a trick question, right? I'm really trying to see if you know the name of the third of the Three Musketeers. O. K., you didn't fall for it. Clearly the first word is about how to get somewhere and the second, how to be clean when you arrive.

All right lexicographers, if you insist. Pathos was an ancient Greek word. It's the arousal of pity or sadness, typically in tragic drama.

Bathos also comes from the Greek and literally means "deep." But it's not deep as in "deep thinker," but rather deep as in the sub-basement of emotions. It's the emotion a soap opera might evoke. Aiming for pathos, it's only pathetic, trite, insincere and overly sentimental.

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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)


Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001


 - posted 03-21-2002 02:14 PM      Profile for Bob Maar   Author's Homepage   Email Bob Maar   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Rated G

Have any married couples been launched into space?

On the 1950s TV show, "The Honeymooners," bus driver Ralph Kramden often promised his wife, "Alice, you're gonna go to the moon!" Neal Armstrong beat her to it.

In 1992, a real married couple did go into space -- together. Astronauts Jan Davis and Mark Lee were preparing for an 8-day mission aboard the Space Shuttle
Endeavor. During their training they secretly married and by the time they revealed it the flight was drawing near. They were permitted to go but NASA scheduled them
on opposite 12-hour shifts. Since astronauts are above it all, so to speak, it's hard to say who worked days and who, nights.

By the way, if you and your sweetie are thinking you, too, would like to really get away from it all, fuhgedaboutit. NASA now nixes space spouses.

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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)


Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001


 - posted 03-22-2002 04:20 PM      Profile for Bob Maar   Author's Homepage   Email Bob Maar   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Rated G

Why do we have earlobes?

Do yours hang low?

they wobble to and fro?

Can you tie them in a knot; can you tie them in a bow? Can you wiggle them, jiggle them and make people giggle with 'em? Or do you just hang earrings from them, as one dangles a hanger from the rod in a closet?

Earlobes are pieces of fatty tissue, hanging like pendants from the outer ear. It's hard to imagine any function for them other than as an aid to accessorizing your head.

But scientists keep trying to come up with what might have been the original purpose for this now vestigial structure.

Maybe when we walked on all fours our earlobes were larger and kept dust and dirt from our ear canals.

One anthropologist even theorizes that they were used for sexual attraction. "Hey, baby, how about a little 'lobe?'" That's so earotic.

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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)


Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001


 - posted 03-23-2002 01:57 PM      Profile for Bob Maar   Author's Homepage   Email Bob Maar   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Rated G

Invented in India, the game of chess was called al-schah-mat or, "The King is Dead," by the Arabs.

The Arabic name eventually evolved into our term, "checkmate."

Then there's the other theory.

"Checkmate" is what Australians who play chess for money and lose say when asked how they're going to pay.

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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)


Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001


 - posted 03-25-2002 08:45 AM      Profile for Bob Maar   Author's Homepage   Email Bob Maar   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Rated G

Why do we say that someone speaking gibberish is talking "mumbo jumbo?"

Logic will not take us very far here. After all, if you had the large, economy-size mumbo, what would you have?

The only other thing the words themselves suggest is that somebody's been mumbling, big time.Usually this sort of expression depends entirely on the sound of the words to convey its meaning and there is no historical etymology.

Not so here, where the expression derives from a word in the African language Mandingo, spoken in the Sudan. The word is "mamagyombo," meaning the guy whose magic powers can banish evil spirits.

Westerners usually consider such a practice, well, mumbo jumbo - gibberish.

So, mumbo jumbo is a witchdoctor. I checked my HMO handbook under "alternative medicine" to see if I could consult one, but the only mumbo jumbo I found was the language describing why they wouldn't pay for this, that and almost every other thing.

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Bob Maar
(Maar stands for Maartini)


Posts: 28608
From: New York City & Newport, RI
Registered: Feb 2001


 - posted 03-25-2002 03:08 PM      Profile for Bob Maar   Author's Homepage   Email Bob Maar   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Rated G

Many years ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the rim or handle of their ceramic cups.

When they needed a refill, they used the whistle to get some service.

"Wet your whistle" is the phrase inspired by this practice.

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