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Topic: Clever customer

Frank Cox
Film God

Posts: 2234
From: Melville Saskatchewan Canada
Registered: Apr 2011

posted 11-18-2015 12:36 PM

I'm playing Bridge of Spies right now. A customer came in last night, walked up to the ticket counter and says, "Is this where I pay the toll for the Bridge of Spies?"

[Smile]

Best one-liner I've heard in a while...

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Mike Blakesley
Film God

Posts: 12767
From: Forsyth, Montana
Registered: Jun 99

posted 11-18-2015 10:44 PM

We get lots of people who come in and go "Two seniors! HAHAHAHA" like that's the first time anybody ever said that. We play along.

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Dave Bird
Jedi Master Film Handler

Posts: 777
From: Perth, Ontario, Canada
Registered: Jun 2000

posted 11-19-2015 09:47 AM

Mostly ours will say "not including the ones in the trunk", and if I happen to be in the box I'll say something like "funny, we're not picking up any on our thermal imaging". A few bite.

Related: I can usually get an eye-roll from my kids if I say "I wonder if you can Help Me Rhonda?" if our cashier's name is Rhonda.....

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Jim Cassedy
Phenomenal Film Handler

Posts: 1661
From: San Francisco, CA
Registered: Dec 2006

posted 11-19-2015 09:54 AM

Reminds me of the story of the young army recruit who went up
to the box office window and asked how much the tickets cost.

"Our general admission is $8"; sez the cashier.

"Then, how much is it for privates?" asks the young soldier.

nyuk, nyuk, nyuk

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Bob Ezra
Film Handler

Posts: 75
From: Carbondale, CO, USA
Registered: Apr 2001

posted 11-19-2015 11:13 AM

our best

"One adult and one adultress...

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Martin McCaffery
Film God

Posts: 2481
From: Montgomery, AL
Registered: Jun 99

posted 11-19-2015 01:36 PM

quote: Mike Blakesley
We get lots of people who come in and go "Two seniors! HAHAHAHA" like that's the first time anybody ever said that. We play along.

Must be a Western thing, we get "Two Children, HAHAHAHA". I just glare at them.

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Frank Cox
Film God

Posts: 2234
From: Melville Saskatchewan Canada
Registered: Apr 2011

posted 11-19-2015 01:45 PM

I get a lot of the "Two children" thing too; my standard reply is, "It's all a matter of attitude, right?"

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Mike Blakesley
Film God

Posts: 12767
From: Forsyth, Montana
Registered: Jun 99

posted 11-19-2015 02:50 PM

When they say "Two children" I say, "We charge by height."

I hate it when we're running a Disney movie with a lot of various age groups and people come in and do that kind of thing.

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Frank Cox
Film God

Posts: 2234
From: Melville Saskatchewan Canada
Registered: Apr 2011

posted 11-19-2015 03:56 PM

Yeah, what you said ^^^^

That's right up there with groups of two or three or four people who can't decide who's paying. "I'll pay." "Don't take her money. Here's the money." "You're not paying. Take this!"

And everyone is shoving twenty dollar bills in my face. GROWL! I usually end up grabbing someone's money, put the change on the counter and wait for them to go on their way. re-GROWL!

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Buck Wilson
Jedi Master Film Handler

Posts: 894
From: St. Joseph MO, USA
Registered: Sep 2010

posted 11-19-2015 05:26 PM

^^^I'll take people fighting to pay for the group any day over the group of 8 teenage girls all the way up to middle aged women who INSIST ON ALL PAYING SEPARATELY. Lady. I can do it all at once. Please.

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Mike Blakesley
Film God

Posts: 12767
From: Forsyth, Montana
Registered: Jun 99

posted 11-19-2015 06:09 PM

What about when it's the new Disney movie and there's a long line, and somebody decides to use this time to teach a child about money. "Give him your $5 bill. No, that's a ten. No no, THAT one. OK, now give him 3 of your quarters. No those are nickels" [Roll Eyes]

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Martin McCaffery
Film God

Posts: 2481
From: Montgomery, AL
Registered: Jun 99

posted 11-19-2015 08:33 PM

And then there are the (almost exclusively women) who get all the way to the box-office before realizing a financial transaction is taking place. You tell them how much it is going to be and THEN they start digging through their purse to find their wallet to see if they have enough money or if they have to use their credit card and then dig around for the right one.

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James Wyrembelski
Expert Film Handler

Posts: 114
From: Beaverton, MI, USA
Registered: Sep 2015

posted 11-19-2015 10:54 PM

Although I do not yet work in a theater....waiting tables at bars and restaurants for 10 years I could fill a book with all of the same one liners I hear on a daily basis.... [Roll Eyes]

My favorite action however is when Im asked for the check....I go to retrieve it reluctantly since I already know as soon as I walk back they hand me a credit card without ever taking the check out of my hand..........if you're not going to look at it, why even bother asking for it....just give me the card! (I always want to see my check anyways to make sure I'm not paying any more than what I requested....)

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Sean Weitzel
Jedi Master Film Handler

Posts: 619
From: Vacaville, CA (1790 miles west of Rockwall)
Registered: Dec 1999

posted 11-23-2015 05:33 PM

This back and forth chat log from a customer and an Amazon customer service rep that made the rounds on the internet a while back always makes me grin:

quote: Chatlog

Me: Tracking shows delivered but shipment not received

Amazon: Warmest greetings [...] my name is Thor.

Me: Greetings, Thor. Can I be Odin?

Amazon: Odin, Father, How art thy doing on this here fine day?

Me: Thor, my son. Agony raises upon my life.

Amazon: This is outrageous! Who dares defy The All Father Odin! What has occurred to cause this agony?

Me: I'm afraid the book I ordered to defeat our enemies has been misplaced. How can we keep Valhalla intact without our sacred book?

Amazon: This is blasphemy! Wherever this book has been taken to, I shall make it my duty to get it back to you! I fear it is Loki but I dare not blame him for such things. I shall have your fortune returned to you and thereafter we can create a new quest in order to get the book back to you.

Me: Very well my son.

Amazon: Allow me some time to round up my allies and complete this my father.

Me: Do it for me Thor, but most importantly do it for the mortals whose destiny (and grades) rely on this book.

Amazon: Alas, the treasure has been returned to you. You now need to reinstate your book into your archive so that you may yet receive it soon. I shall have the Valkyrie deliver it to you as fast as their wings can move.

Me: Ok so roleplay aside I have my money back and reorder the book?

Amazon: haha yes I have refunded you and you need to reorder the book.

Me: Great!

Amazon: Have you placed the order

Me: Let me do that
done

Amazon: Okay let me edit it for you [...] that good?

Me: Wow hooking me up for one day delivery? Sweet!

Amazon: Haha yea man gotta get your book asap!

Me: I've heard Amazon has great customer service and this just proves it! thanks man

Amazon: No problem, is there any other issue or question that I can help you with?

Me: Nah that was it. Really appreciate it

Amazon: Anytime bro. Have a great day. Goodbye Odin

Me: Bye my son.

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