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Author Topic: Piglet's Big Movie
Brad Miller
Administrator

Posts: 17775
From: Plano, TX (36.2 miles NW of Rockwall)
Registered: May 99


 - posted 03-21-2003 03:43 PM      Profile for Brad Miller   Author's Homepage   Email Brad Miller       Edit/Delete Post 
Yes, I know this is a G rated movie intended for kids, but...

What an effing piece of shit! I would never subject my kids to crap like this. Could they possibly have made it more boring? Did anyone else get a craving for piglet pork chops during the show? Here are a bunch of animals with no life and hardly any brains. Just watch Winnie the Poo and Pigvomit try and build a house for the donkey. It's a bunch of sticks leaning on each other. Then we find out that the donkey built the exact same house elsewhere, because he is also too stupid to build a house even half-assed properly. However Poo boy lives in a nice house, but apparently these sticks are good enough for the donkey that he calls his "friend". Yeah ok, let's teach the kiddies that it is ok to shaft your "friends" with a shitty house so long as you are comfy. And no feline springs around on his tail! Stupid, stupid, stupid.

They spend the entire movie looking for the lost Pigvomit by reading his scrapbook of memories, and when they lose the book they think his memories are floating down the river. Durp! Yeah, like Pigvomit won't continue to remember them (or are pigs really that dumb?) Anyway, who goes sleuthing merely by looking through a scrapbook. Idiots!!! This whole movie looked to me like one of those rip-off sitcoms on tv where they have everyone sit around, roll a couple of minutes worth of new footage as everyone "reminisces" of past shows, use old clips from old shows, and then they call this one a new show. Well, maybe this movie was 100% all new stories, but it sure looked to me like Disney just grabbed some old footage out of storage and animated a few minutes so they could release a new movie and cash in.

And what's with the dude with the overbite at the end singing his sappy lame 60's sounding songs while playing his guitar in the woods? I'll bet Disney threw this whole thing together to rake in at the box office and then on top of that sell some albums. Greedy bastards!

If the whole thing weren't so wimpy, overly sweet and straight out of the 60's I suppose I could have tolerated it. As it is, the sappy sweetness of the movie made me want to beat someone when it was over to make up for it. Whoever was responsible for making this movie, if I ever meet you prepare to be slapped.

[thumbsdown] [thumbsdown]

[sleep] [sleep]

[puke] [puke]

[sex] [sex]

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Michael Gonzalez
Jedi Master Film Handler

Posts: 790
From: Grand Island , NE USA
Registered: Sep 2000


 - posted 03-21-2003 08:01 PM      Profile for Michael Gonzalez   Email Michael Gonzalez   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Damn Brad, a little harsh don't you think? Though admittaly I am not goin to go nowhere near this picture, I am pretty sure that the three and four year olds that this movie was intended for, are going to enjoy it.

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Brad Miller
Administrator

Posts: 17775
From: Plano, TX (36.2 miles NW of Rockwall)
Registered: May 99


 - posted 03-21-2003 11:32 PM      Profile for Brad Miller   Author's Homepage   Email Brad Miller       Edit/Delete Post 
Too harsh? Not for this thing. A movie intended for children does not have to be torturous to sit through.

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Jacob Huber
Expert Film Handler

Posts: 172
From: Evansville, IN, USA
Registered: Feb 2002


 - posted 03-22-2003 02:17 AM      Profile for Jacob Huber   Email Jacob Huber   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Same here. It felt like a flachback episode of a sitcom; more than 3/4 of it was flashback. The songs were terrible and this "feel good morality movie" had terrible morals. It's like they pretty much tell little kids that feel that they don't have any friends, all you have to do to get people to like you is to run away and they'll miss you. Even though he doesn't run away, that's what I got from it. Occasionaly I'd watch an episode of the show on Disney, maybe once a year or so, and any episode would be significantly better than this movie. It's like they didn't even try.

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Christian Appelt
Jedi Master Film Handler

Posts: 505
From: Frankfurt, Germany
Registered: Dec 2001


 - posted 03-22-2003 11:28 AM      Profile for Christian Appelt   Email Christian Appelt   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I agree with Brad. Movies for children should not be "just good enough for kids". I`d say good children`s films (or books or whatever media) will always carry a little more than you understand as a child, a touch of universal, timeless storytelling.
This is why you can read vintage Carl Barks Disney comics when your 40 or 50 and still have fun - they were not satisfied with "dumb stories" for kids "who don`t get it anyway". [Frown]

At a children`s film festival I heard a film director from Sweden say: "Films for children have, in fact, to be much better than those for adults because they will make a lot more impact on the mind."

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Per Hauberg
Jedi Master Film Handler

Posts: 883
From: Malling, Denmark
Registered: Jul 2000


 - posted 04-02-2003 05:51 PM      Profile for Per Hauberg   Author's Homepage   Email Per Hauberg   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Carl Barks' work is not kiddie entertainment - It's pure art for grown-ups, who grew up without getting grumphy.
Piglet is one of those very rear films for the very youngest cinema-goers, that we all need to start early and become REEL addicts to secure the survival of our profession.
Besides, who'd ever expect teddy bears and their fellow animals to be intelligent ?
Let Your inner kid survive, Brad - Then there will be hope for next generation projectionists ! -Ask downstairs, if they have a spare Pooh from their displays - bring it to the boot on loan, and let it take a ride on the platter for a while - It will sure help You on a rainy day (but don't speed - otherwise You'll have Pooh all over the place) [Big Grin]

p

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John Pytlak
Film God

Posts: 9987
From: Rochester, NY 14650-1922
Registered: Jan 2000


 - posted 04-03-2003 11:37 AM      Profile for John Pytlak   Author's Homepage   Email John Pytlak   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
Per Hauberg wrote:

quote:
Piglet is one of those very rear films for the very youngest cinema-goers, that we all need to start early and become REEL addicts to secure the survival of our profession.

Some of my first memories of movie-going were "Bambi" and "20,000 Leagues Under the Sea", when I was only about 6 years old. I agree that seeing a good movie on a big screen makes a lifetime impression on a young child, much more than the same material on a home television screen.

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Darren Crimmins
Expert Film Handler

Posts: 130
From: Dallas, TX, USA
Registered: Jan 2002


 - posted 04-04-2003 05:22 PM      Profile for Darren Crimmins   Email Darren Crimmins   Send New Private Message       Edit/Delete Post 
I think it is important that kids movies can at least be partly entertaining for the parents who take them. I remember when I was a kid watching "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory" and thought it was great. And when I watch it now, it has alot of adult undertones and humor that I can still enjoy it. They need to make more films like that today. Everyone is so frightened to put subtle adult themes into kids movies because it will corrupt them, but young kids won't understand them anyway, and it makes it enjoyable for adults. [evil]

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Brad Miller
Administrator

Posts: 17775
From: Plano, TX (36.2 miles NW of Rockwall)
Registered: May 99


 - posted 04-04-2003 07:04 PM      Profile for Brad Miller   Author's Homepage   Email Brad Miller       Edit/Delete Post 
The Goonies and The Sandlot are also excellent examples of films intended for kids that are also enjoyable for adults.

This thread is starting to wander quite a bit from the actual movie reviews of Piglet. If anyone would like to comment further regarding bad kids movies that pains adults to watch, please start a Yak thread.

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