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"Look Roger, we just found an Olds with a working short block that'll start first try!"

"Unh, Unh! (& more tooltime sounds)"

I've watched a few segments of that show and have thought the same thing.

How would such an episode go?...

Let's see. The junk pile would need to have several old 35mm projectors with many good parts that just happened to be thrown away, maybe by a theatre company in bankruptcy that closed a nonprofitable location or two and walked away from the equipment. Maybe some boxes of projector lamps will be discovered with their contents unbroken, and maybe even some not quite empty bottles of FilmGuard too!

Oh, look, there are some metal 48 inch circular picnic tables that someone threw away! We can use the tops for platters! Oh, and I see some old glass Coke bottles and an old kid's magnifying glass. Maybe we can make some sort of lens conbination out of that.

Let's take that old steering wheel off that old junked car and take this duct tape and make us a lens turret. There are some old white bedsheets that will do for a screen, and some old curtains we can rig up for masking. We can probably tinker with that old table radio and make it work. I see a CD-to-FM radio converter that some kid threw away. We can use that to get out audio signal to the table radio. Just run it up real loud and put it behind the sheet.

Hey, look over there! There are a bunch of old rusty metal folding chairs that a local church threw away. We're almost ready to start charging admission!

All we lack now is a movie to show -- Hey, what's that over there? Eureka, it's that print of Star Wars Episode I that got stolen from that theatre back in 1999. It's all cut up, but we can scotch tape it together and use it!

Sorry. I got carried away.

Evans A Criswell
http://home.hiwaay.net/~criswell/theatre/

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"They'd have movable masking, unlike some Regal (cough) Cobb theatres."

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>No, you didn't get carried away. I was looking for it, but you missed it. I'll say it for you.

>"They'd have movable masking, unlike some Regal (cough) Cobb theatres."

Um, I figured you might cloud up and rain all over the place if I put that in there, so I didn't.

>I must say I enjoyed the rest of your epsode though.

So, you enjoyed all of my episode except for the punch line that I didn't put in there? It's funny how that line did its job, even though I omitted it.

Sorry if my tone is a little different than usual. I just got dismissed from jury duty this afternoon.

I'd rather attempt to assemble a projector from junk parts any day than have jury duty in my county.

Evans