Random News Stories

[Leo Enticknap]

Those of you who followed the random news stories thread on the old forum may remember that I posted an article reporting on a previous attempt by "Mad Mike" Hughes (in March 2018), an eccentric in the tradition of Lawnchair Larry, to prove that the earth is flat, by launching himself in a steam-powered rocket from the Southern Californian desert, to see for himself. Of course he could have just handed over $100 to Southwest Airlines and gone up in a 737 from Ontario (which would likely have proven to his satisfaction that the earth is flat, because a 737 can't go high enough to get anywhere near the Kármán Line), but that would just be too boring, wouldn't it? Anyways, Hughes tried again last week: sadly, for the last time. This from Popular Mechanics:

Daredevil Dies in Failed Homemade Rocket Launch to Prove Earth Is Flat

Guinness World Record holder "Mad" Mike Hughes was 64.
Daredevil "Mad" Mike Hughes died Saturday, February 22 after his homemade rocket crashed into the ground outside of Barstow, California. Hughes launched himself inside the steam-powered rocket in hopes that he might sail high enough into the atmosphere to prove that the Earth is flat. He was 64.

Several journalists, along with many of the rocketeer’s friends—including longtime collaborator Wade Stakes, according to The Washington Post—were on hand to witness the launch and sadly captured its swift failure. Freelance journalist Justin Chapman tweeted a video of the crash. (Warning: Some viewers may find the video disturbing.)

Mad Mike Hughes just launched himself in a self-made steam-powered rocket and crash landed. Very likely did not survive. #MadMike #MadMikeHughes pic.twitter.com/svtviTEi8f
— Justin Chapman (@justindchapman) February 22, 2020

Seconds after launch, a parachute can be seen fluttering away from the speeding rocket, which quickly turned back toward Earth. “When the rocket was nosediving and he didn't release the three other parachutes he had in the rocket, lots of people screamed out and started wailing,” Chapman told BuzzFeed News. “Everyone was stunned when he crashed and didn't know what to do.”

Hughes aimed to reach the Kármán Line, where Earth's atmosphere and outer space meet, 62 miles above the ground. From there, Hughes claimed he'd be able to tell whether the Earth is a flat disk (as he suspected) or a sphere. The steam-driven rocket included three heaters that would produce enough steam to thrust the stuntman at least 5,000 feet into the air. He hoped to reach top speeds of up to 425 miles per hour.

The limousine driver-turned-daredevil got his start by conducting a series of high-octane stunts that shocked and enthralled viewers. Hughes is the Guinness World Record holder for the longest limousine ramp jump (103 feet in a stretch Lincoln Town Car) and has gained fame over the years for performing a series of other stunts. A 2014 rocket launch took him to 1,374 feet, according to Associated Press reports at the time.

In recent years, Hughes's efforts turned toward unraveling a conspiracy theory that has endured for centuries.

[Leo Enticknap]

Unconventional responses to the coronavirus thus far have included the guy in Arizona who drank fish tank cleaner (believing that, because it contained quinine, it would help to prevent him from catching the bug), hundreds of Indians drinking methanol for the same reason, and someone who was arrested by the FBI while preparing to blow up his local hospital, the rationale being that if it no longer existed, then neither would the risk of infection in his neighborhood. But this has to be the wackiest yet (link to story):

An Australian astrophysicist was hospitalized with magnets stuck up his nose while trying to create a necklace that will warn people when they touch their face so that they don’t become infected with the Chinese virus.

Australian astrophysicist Daniel Reardon was hospitalized after getting four magnets stuck up his nose while trying to invent a device that would help prevent people avoid behaviors associated with contracting the Wuhan coronavirus such as touching their face, according to a report by the Guardian.

“I have some electronic equipment but really no experience or expertise in building circuits or things,” said Reardon to Guardian Australia.

“I thought that if I built a circuit that could detect the magnetic field, and we wore magnets on our wrists, then it could set off an alarm if you brought it too close to your face. A bit of boredom in isolation made me think of that,” he added.

The report added that the 27-year-old astrophysicist, who is a research fellow at a Melbourne university, had been creating a necklace that sounds an alarm when the wearer touches their face.

“I accidentally invented a necklace that buzzes continuously unless you move your hand close to your face,” said Reardon.

“After scrapping that idea, I was still a bit bored, playing with the magnets,” he added. “It’s the same logic as clipping pegs to your ears — I clipped them to my earlobes and then clipped them to my nostril and things went downhill pretty quickly when I clipped the magnets to my other nostril.”

The astrophysicist said that he had placed two magnets inside his nose, and then two on the outside, and that when he removed the magnets from the outside of his nose, the two inside had gotten stuck together.

Then, Reardon then decided to use his two remaining magnets to try to remove the magnets inside his nose, according to the Guardian.

“At this point, my partner who works at a hospital was laughing at me,” said Reardon. “I was trying to pull them out, but there is a ridge at the bottom of my nose you can’t get past.”

“After struggling for 20 minutes, I decided to Google the problem and found an article about an 11-year-old boy who had the same problem,” added the astrophysicist. “The solution in that was more magnets — to put on the outside to offset the pull from the ones inside.”

Reardon noted that he tried to add more magnets, but they, too got stuck in his nose, and he couldn’t add more magnets because he “ran out of magnets.”

“As I was pulling downwards to try and remove the magnets, they clipped on to each other and I lost my grip,” said Reardon. “And those two magnets ended up in my left nostril while the other one was in my right.”

“At this point, I ran out of magnets,” he added.

So then, the astrophysicist attempted to remove the magnets with a pair of pliers, only to have those become magnetized to the magnets inside his nose as well.

“Every time I brought the pliers close to my nose, my entire nose would shift towards the pliers and then the pliers would stick to the magnet. It was a little bit painful at this point.”

From there, Reardon said that his partner took him to the hospital because “she wanted all her colleagues to laugh at me.”

“The doctors thought it was quite funny, making comments like ‘This is an injury due to self-isolation and boredom.'” said the astrophysicist.

Two doctors ended up manually removing the magnets using an anesthetic spray, reports the Guardian.

“When they got the three out from the left nostril, the last one fell down my throat,” said Reardon. “That could have been a bit of a problem if I swallowed or breathed it in, but I was thankfully able to lean forward and cough it out.”

“Needless to say I am not going to play with the magnets any more,” he added.

[Frank Cox]

COVID-19: Hamilton police arrest alleged drug dealer — for violating shutdown of non-essential businesses

https://nationalpost.com/news/covid-...ial-businesses

Hamilton police charged an alleged street drug dealer with violating the COVID-19 emergency declaration for conducting a non-essential business during the pandemic shutdown.

The 29-year-old man was also charged with drug trafficking and proceeds of crime charges.

Members of the Hamilton police drug unit were in the city’s east end when they saw a black Jeep Grand Cherokee being driven in an aggressive manner on Friday. Officers discovered the vehicle was improperly plated and began monitoring its movements, police said.

The officers watched the Jeep stop several times as the driver pulled over to conduct drug transactions as he drove through the entire downtown core, police allege. Shortly before 8:00 p.m., it stopped at a commercial business in the city’s west end, near McMaster University.

A condition under the order includes all non-essential businesses to cease functioning.

The driver was arrested for drug trafficking. During a search, police said they found further evidence to support criminal charges: cocaine valued at $3,400 divided into a number of small plastic bags, along with $5,690 in Canadian currency and $20 in U.S. currency, police said.

He was then also notified of the unusual charge of violating the Emergency Management and Civil Protection Act.

“Currently, due to COVID-19, a declaration of emergency has been enacted under the Emergency Management and Civil Protection Act. A condition under the order includes all non-essential businesses to cease functioning,” Const. Jerome Stewart said.

“He was issued the ticket simply because the business he was operating is not considered essential.”

[Leo Enticknap]

Marijuana retailing has been declared an essential business by the Governor of California, so he'd have been OK here!

[Frank Cox]

Both liquor and marijuana stores have been declared essential in Saskatchewan, but not vaping stores. So you can get drunk or high but you can't vape, apparently.

There's a vaping store just down the street from me, actually. He's still operating but with a small table and a rock set up in front of the door of his shop. According to the sign on the table, you are to send him a text to tell him what you want and, if you're paying with cash, put your money under the rock. Then you go to sit in your car and he will bring your product and your change out in a bag and put it on the table. After he goes back inside you can leave your car and pick up your stuff from the table. He will then come out again after you're gone and disinfect the table and the rock before the next customer.

I had to stop and read the sign on his table when I went past the other day because it seemed like such a long and involved process. But I guess he must figure it's worth his while to do it that way, and I suppose he can argue that he's not actually doing any customer-facing transactions that way.

[Dave Macaulay]

Ontario today declared cannabis shops non-essential and they must close. Beer and booze remain essential.

[Leo Enticknap]

This is an old one (specifically, the Sunday Sport of October 6, 2013, p. 7), but a good one:

[James Biggins]

This is an old one (specifically, the Sunday Sport of October 6, 2013, p. 7)

Funny, but if it was in the Sunday Sport it was, of course completely bogus.


e.g.


sunday-sport.gif

[Allan Young]

I'll see your World War 2 bomber and raise you...

[Dave Macaulay]

I miss the days when news in "reputable" newspapers and online outlets was more reliable than what was in the National Enquirer, Weekly World news, The Onion, etc.

[Randy Stankey]

I remember the good, old days when the air was clean and sex was dirty.
— George Burns

[Leo Enticknap]

I believe that Elvis was supposed to be keeping Hitler and Lord Lucan company up there at one point, too. Anyways, here's one that even the Sunday Sport would have been unlikely to come up with ... and it really should have been published 16 days ago! A Dr. Salami in Iran has invented a magnetic "coronameter," that can sniff out someone who has the bug from 100 meters away!

ran’s Major General Hossein Salami reportedly doubled down Friday on claims the Islamic Revolutionary Guards Corps (IRGC) had invented a special magnetic, all purpose coronavirus detector machine that is the envy of the world.

The IRGC commander reasserted claims the miraculous device can remotely identify infected people and contaminated areas within a range of 100 meters through a special aerial system and internal bipolar magnetic fields.

According to an AL Monitor report, Salami claimed dozens of countries have already contacted Iran about the machine, but if the U.S. ever asked Iran to share the technology he would refuse, saying it “would not be shared with the Americans until all sanctions are removed.”

Salami unveiled the device April 15 on Iranian television. According to Salami, it can remotely detect an infected surface or individual in five seconds, as Breitbart News reported.

Scientists working under IRGC command designed the detector, which uses a magnetic field and reportedly has an accuracy rate approaching 80 percent – but only in favorable conditions.

Many critics pointed out the device replicated the fraudulent bomb detection wands, invented by a British businessman, that were used in Iraq at the height of suicide bombings.

Video evidence provided by the Middle East Media Research Institute (MEMRI) would seem to support that theory.

In May 2017, the Iranian news agency, IRNA, aired a report about an identical-looking device that was purported to be able to detect between one liter and 1000 liters of fuel, also using magnetic fields and “bi-polar” technology.

The device was meant to help Iranian authorities combat fuel smuggling, MEMRI reports.

Despite Iran’s serious claims for the future success of the machine, not everyone is convinced.

Jokes about the device are going viral on social media with the Persian-language Twitter account of the U.S. State Department posting: “It is strange that the device always beeps when it is nearing the guards. Can you next build a device for detection of jinns?”

Len Khodrokovsky, a State Department advisor, also took to Twitter to share his scepticism about the electronic, all-magnetic coronavirus detector machine:

Introducing a brand-new, highly-sophisticated CORONAMETER from the fine medical professionals at the IRGC. Endorsed by Dr. Salami. pic.twitter.com/6uNQC5Gz5J

— Len Khodorkovsky (@MessageFromLen) April 15, 2020

Closer to home an advisor to President Hassan Rouhani blasted the IRGC for making the machine public, expressing his fears such a move amounts to an “advertisment” of state capabilities.

“Do not advertise vaccines, medicine, [coronavirus] test kits or unique and innovative virus detection devices that have not been approved by the Health Ministry,” said Hesameddin Ashena, who is Rouhani’s media advisor, according to Radio Farda.

The criticism has been roundly rejected by the IRGC with spokesman Ramazan Sharif saying, “Soon, the production process, technical features and capabilities of the device will be shared with the media and experts.”

In response to the international mockery of the device, Sharif was unmoved. He said “Iranians take more pride and honor in causing the shock and anger of enemies and those who want ill for us.”

I don't claim to be a scientific expert, but how, exactly, can magnetism detect a pathogen? Biomatter of any description cannot be polarized, surely?

[Leo Enticknap]

And another novel coronavirus treatment from Iran. Drinking camel's piss can help you beat the bug ... but only when it's fresh and warm!

Iranian ‘Prophetic Medicine’ Leader: Camel Urine Cures Coronavirus

An Iranian man who describes himself as an Islamic prophetic medicine healer has prescribed drinking camel urine as a treatment for the Chinese coronavirus, Radio Farda reported Monday.

In a video that has reportedly gone viral across social media, the Chairman of the Prophetic Medicine Society Medhi Sabili urged people to consume the urine when it is both “fresh and warm.” It was quickly ridiculed by Iranians, many of whom warned about the dangers of such treatment.

The consumption of camel urine, as well as camel meat and camel meat, is not uncommon across the Middle East. In some countries, including Saudi Arabia, many believe that it can cure a range of ailments.

داروی جدید ضد کرونا طبق روایات اسلامی: شاش شتر. pic.twitter.com/n6W2NDXgFx

— رضا حقيقتنژاد (@rezahn56) April 19, 2020

Rather than curing the coronavirus, the World Health Organization (WHO) last year warned that camel urine was actually a transmitter of the Middle East respiratory syndrome coronavirus (MERS-CoV), a virus from the same family as the Chinese coronavirus causing the current pandemic.

The WHO noted at the time:

Although most of human cases of MERS-CoV infections have been attributed to human-to-human infections in health care settings, current scientific evidence suggests that dromedary camels are a major reservoir host for MERS-CoV and an animal source of MERS infection in humans.

The origins of the virus are not fully understood but, according to the analysis of different virus genomes, it is believed that it may have originated in bats and was transmitted to camels sometime in the distant past.

The report did reaffirm the nutritional benefits of other camel products:

Camel meat and camel milk are nutritious products that can continue to be consumed after pasteurization, cooking, or other heat treatments.

Until more is understood about MERS-CoV, people with diabetes, renal failure, chronic lung disease, and immunocompromised persons are considered to be at high risk of severe disease from MERS-CoV infection. These people should avoid contact with camels, drinking raw camel milk or camel urine, or eating meat that has not been properly cooked.

Iran remains one of the countries most badly hit by the coronavirus pandemic. As a result, some Islamic doctors have attempted to come up with their own cures for the infection, with remedies including placing a cotton ball dipped in violet oil up one’s anus, or dropping bitter watermelon oil in ears and nose.

Many Iranians also believe in the effectiveness of Iranian traditional medicine, which largely centers around taking large doses of fruit and vegetables. These methods are so popular that the price of such products has risen since the outbreak began.

There are currently no known scientific cures for the Chinese coronavirus, nor has a vaccine been developed. Trials are currently taking place around the world, although there is currently no fixed date for its release. Many expect the vaccine to reach mass distribution as late as the second half of 2021.

According to recent data, Iran has so far recorded around 83,500 cases and 5,200 deaths from the coronavirus, making it the eighth-most affected country worldwide. Many doubt the accuracy of official Iranian statistics, however; some estimates say upwards of 30,000 have died of coronavirus infections in the country.

[Frank Cox]

https://canoe.com/news/weird/ukraini...e-cb2963cb5a74

Ukrainian woman uses panties for facemask

Talk about quick thinking.

A Ukrainian woman wasn’t about to be denied service at a post office for not wearing a mask, as has been mandated in her country since April.

The woman was caught on camera taking off her panties and then wearing them as a makeshift mask. Not surprisingly, the footage recorded at the Nova Posha post office in Kiev went viral.

The woman clearly wasn’t pleased when told she wouldn’t be allowed to take care of her postal requirements and angrily removed her pants in front of other customers and put the white panties over her face.

According to U.K.’s The Sun, the woman is a mother of two who doesn’t like the restrictions imposed in Ukraine during the COVID-19 pandemic. Residents have had to wear a mask in public and carry identification since April.

“Well, she found a way around it,” someone said on a social media post. “No one has banned the use of panties instead of a mask yet!”

The best comment? “She was lucky she wasn’t wearing a thong that day, otherwise the idea would have failed!”

Even though it was a special delivery, apparently a post-office employee is in hot water for releasing the video.

[Randy Stankey]

Which side did she put over her face? The front or the back?

Not a very pleasant conundrum to consider...